Unhappy at Work? Here’s what to do about it!

Amanda thought that her life would change for the best when she clinched a job at a firm of city consultants. The pay wasn’t great but the company was offering far more money than she had ever earned in a previous temp role. Furthermore there was scope for career progression, staff seemed friendly enough and the workload promised to be challenging. During the first few months Amanda got to work an hour early, left very late and smiled an awful lot. However, 6 months later she was feeling terribly depressed on Monday mornings…

‘Career Happiness’ can be a bit like a firework display; beautiful to behold but quick to sizzle out. In May 2007, a ‘Happiness at Work’ survey by recruitment consultants, Badenoch & Clark, revealed that nearly 25% of UK office workers were unhappy with their jobs. But what does unhappiness mean? And does it ‘really’ matter if one is unhappy in the workplace? After all our forefathers didn’t have worker’s unions, paid holiday and half the benefits we enjoy today, yet managed well enough.

Unhappiness can be defined as feelings of sorrow or sadness as a result of perceived negativity in one’s environment. Feelings of unhappiness range in intensity (some unhappy feelings can be banished easily, others can linger, clouding judgement and leading to a depressed state of being). According to Anthony de Mello, ‘there is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs we have in our heads, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to us to question them.’ And yet we all know that there is nothing more infuriating than being told to ‘cheer up’ or ‘be content with what we have’ when unhappiness sets in.

So does ‘happiness at work’ matter? Of course it does. Although some research statistics claim that unhappy workers are more productive, because they just tend to knuckle down and get on with the job, people who aren’t well rewarded for the work they do (rewarded financially and otherwise) also tend to have a negative outlook, be less creative and move on to greener pastures as soon as they can. Unhappiness at work has also been linked to high stress levels and ill health.

The point in question isn’t whether ‘happiness at work’ affects company productivity but if it matters to you. In other words, Do you want to be happy at work? Can you afford not to be? The older generation may have managed very well without career happiness (as well as anaesthesia and refrigerators), but thankfully modern life presents different challenges and opportunities.

Having experienced both ‘extreme happiness’ and ‘utter dejection’ in the workplace, I can safely say that the following steps can help you gain a proper perspective on work situations, renew passion for work and create a career that takes your unique talents, skills and insight into consideration. Life is short, after all, too short to be unhappy at the one place we spend the majority of our waking hours at.

1. Reflect: Whilst it is tempting to wallow in feelings of unhappiness, it is wiser to reflect on, and learn from, those negative feelings. How do you feel inside when unhappiness strikes? Which people and situations trigger off unhappiness at work? When are things better? How long has this been going on? Have you been happier at work? Why do you think you were happier at work? What does happiness feel like; look like? What would change if you became happier? Once you get the facts, figures and feelings on paper, it’ll be easier to manage the way you feel.

For instance, when Amanda reflected on her unhappy state, she realised that sheer relief at finding a permanent job had tinted her spectacles too much. As reality set in, she realised that her colleagues weren’t as friendly as she’d thought and that there wasn’t scope for career progression after all.

Take time to reflect on the people, ethics, systems and situations that fuel your discontentment. Even those who are lucky enough to have the job of their dreams will sometimes find their enthusiasm floundering. By creating a tangible vision of your ideal working life, you make it so much easier to create, or recreate, what you desire.

2. Refine: Once you’ve ascertained the reason for your unhappiness, the next step is to think logically about the issues you have identified. Sometimes our judgement is flawed when it comes to personal matters. It might help to seek a trusted person’s advice or carry out some serious role play.

For instance, some of the common reasons why people are unhappy at work stem from: jealousy, perfectionism, complacency, negativity, low self esteem and meaninglessness. Often, forgetting that life is a long distance race, many people compare themselves with apparently ‘more successful’ people and constantly fall short. At other times we expend too much effort on unnecessary tasks and, naturally, become frustrated. Sometimes feelings of unhappiness are caused by lack of confidence, the fact that we don’t think highly enough of ourselves to accept compliments or criticism. Worst is when the work we do seems to conflict with our values and ethics or seem to serve no purpose at all.

To enhance objectivity, it may help to pretend that the thoughts and wishes you have put down on paper belong to someone else. For example, if you have admitted that feelings of unhappiness arise when the office secretary shows up in ill matching clothes, reason with yourself the same way you would reason with a paranoid relative. Put things in perspective, laugh at yourself if necessary but don’t become defensive. Embrace who you are by acknowledging your strengths and weaknesses.

3. Resolve: Unhappiness is often a sign that change is necessary. Many people desire a better quality of life but would rather complain endlessly than take the actions required to create the changes they seek. You cannot change until you resolve to change. In fact the reason why many promises aren’t kept is because they were never rooted in resolve, never seriously intended. People fail because they permit themselves to fail; people succeed because they permit themselves to succeed. In a sense we have to walk to the door of ’self will’ and turn the key in the lock before meaningful changes can occur.

Are you ready to be happy at work? Are you willing to create the life you want? Close your eyes and imagine turning the handle of inner resolve.

4. React: Once you have resolved to actively seek change, what you need is a strategy, a series of steps that can take you from the valleys of discontent up to the plateaus of career happiness.

Think about the steps you can take to reignite the passion in your work life, for instance varying your routine, building better working relationships and learning to ask for what you need. If you want a fun workplace, take the initiative to organise social activities. If you want a new challenge, consider seeking in-house training or secondment opportunities. If you want to be appreciated for a job well done, then politely ask your boss to do so. In a sense, office relationships are like amorous relationships. Sometimes you have to tell your partner (colleagues and contractors) what your specific preferences are.

Your self worth is indicative of the change-able things you refuse to change. Why endure an unfulfilling career when there are more suitable opportunities out there? Why complain when you can simply create your dream career? Because of fear perhaps? But fear of what exactly; financial security, social prestige?

Ironically, the laws of the universe mandate that we lose the very things we hold onto. For instance, investment accounts pay far more interest than basic savings accounts do. The greater the risk; the greater the reward. People who store their money in savings accounts, because they want to preserve their financial security, actually rob themselves of financial security by refusing to take calculated risks. Even the Holy Book teaches that we multiply what we have when we are willing to give it away (John 12; 24).

Some people allow excuses to cloud their better judgement. Don’t be one of them. If you desire career happiness, then it will interest you to know that it is attainable whether you have young children to feed or not, whether you have a supportive family or not, whether you are middle aged or teen aged, whether you have a stash of money set aside to pay the bills or not. Where there is a will, there is a way. Of course certain situations are more challenging than others, but whatever your circumstances, you will succeed, so long as you apply the appropriate strategies.

React positively. When Amanda realised that she was in the wrong line of work, she took stock of her talents, knowledge and experiences and began to explore better opportunities elsewhere. The more responsibility she took toward creating her dream career, the more her self confidence was renewed. Likewise, by taking consistent actions towards your desired goals, your happiness will be restored.

5. Remember: What did you want to be when you grew up? Was there ever a time when you couldn’t wait to come of age so that you could do all the amazing things you wished to do? Was there ever a time when life seemed easy; when everything seemed possible? If there was ever such a time, remember it.

The adage ‘follow your heart’ may sound out of place in the career world, but the greatest achievers today are all people who found the courage to find their own path in life regardless of what the naysayers thought. If you’ve reached a point where work seems more of a chore than an exciting challenge, then the time has come to look yourself in the eye and say ‘what do I really want out of life? What would it take to make me truly happy? If there was no fear of failure or shame, what would I do?’

Follow your heart; whether that means sharing radical ideas at board meetings, seeking alternative employment or setting up a business of your own. Why settle for less than you deserve? You can create your Dream Career one step at a time!

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Ogo Ogbata is a multi talented writer, speaker and consultant. Founder of the Creativity and Sense Network, she empowers people to create financially rewarding work that allows time and energy for what matters most in life.

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